Enjoys

I meet with

Incall rates

Duration	Cost
15 mins	£50
½ Hour	£100
¾ Hour	£150
1 Hour	£200
1½ Hours	£300
2 Hours	£400
3 Hours	£500
4 Hours	£600
Overnight	£800

Outcall rates

Duration	Cost
15 mins	£0
½ Hour	£0
¾ Hour	£0
1 Hour	£280
1½ Hours	£380
2 Hours	£480
3 Hours	£580
4 Hours	£680
Overnight	£800

FAQs

Q : How do I make a booking with you?

A : Introduce yourself with a short email, see ‘to send me an email click here’ at the bottom left of the page. A few lines is enough, with a date/time, and any relevant details about your personal preferences. I’ll answer asap, and we shall arrange to discuss and make our plans from there. Don’t put in a booking form with no previous introduction, let’s communicate properly first. One liners like ‘Hey hun’ ‘Hey u avail now’ etc will be ignored. I would choose to starve before meeting anyone so rude. I’m easily pleased, just behave like a decent human, and you’ll be fine.

Q : May I have a same day booking?

A : Yes, if I'm available, and if we have met before, a text in some form is fine, along with about 60-90min notice please! If you're NEW to me, give me as much notice as possible, 2hrs maybe, and a proper real life phone conversation first. Find info on MORE ME, links at bottom.

Q : How natural is your ladygarden?

A : If you're in pursuit of hirsute, I'm your woman. I’m trimmed and also tidied up on the edge. You can pretend it's the 70s/80s and re-live the dream of your first furtive fumbles with Karen from the Co-op, whilst you were thinking of your favourite dancer from Pan’s People/Legs & Co/Hot Gossip. Just in case you were wondering about the rest, I do shave my legs and underarms everyday. Having pubic hair has become ‘hip’ again I see, but when it goes out of fashion again, I’ll still have it.

Q : How old are you really? I met a 25yr old who was really 65 when I got there…it's ok to be 65, but she lied.

A : I was born April 1966, so count from there. Now, I’m 58. Lots of people (not men trying to flatter, but women too) say I look younger, and out in the real world, people think I'm about 10yr younger. I'll always tell my real age/weight etc. You deserve that so you may make your choices. Upon arrival, you can always run away, but I’d prefer that you didn’t scream, because I have neighbours. I’m going to be a geriatric floozie anyhow, that’s always been in The Grand Plan! Yes, there is a market for older ladies. As long as you market to your target group, you’ll do just fine. Many people don’t have the privilege of being alive for a long time, so I’m happy to still be here.

Q : How health conscious are you?

A : As an aside from my attempts at comedic writing here, I am actually a smart sensible responsible person too, and I do take our health seriously. I strongly feel that it’s part of my job to protect both of us. I am fully checked out regularly for sexual health and I ask to print the results too, so I can prove it, if you ask. Nervous or new? Let's test together, if you like, I’m fine with that if you are. We can go on same day, separate times, for privacy (from clinic workers). A professional sex worker who takes their/your safety measures seriously, is much safer than the random amateur you met in a bar. I don't take chances, it could be the end of my business. I go to (free) Dean St Express 'sex worker' clinic SWISH in Soho and sometimes a private clinic, (Same Day Doctor or Rood Lane Medical or Doc Tap) for faster services. I'm also vaccinated against Hepatitis and Covid and Flu. Last shots Nov 2024. Do you get STI tested too? No excuse not to, it's free and confidential at Dean St Express. REGISTER. You can be called John Doe if you want, just get tested.

Q : Is your ‘enjoys’ list negotiable, are there secret extras?

A : NO. I won’t be persuaded for £££ here, or in a real life meeting either. Just see someone who offers what you require.

Q : May I see you very early morning, like 7am?

A : Yes, but DO NOT call me at 6am... as castration with a rusty axe often offends. Make the booking the day/eve before, please...let me know by 10pm. Organisation is key here! If you want to book a longer meeting (say 2hrs), I will make you a tasty cooked breakfast too.

Q : I really, really want proper DFK, I love kissing, but some fake it, avoid it…I’m disappointed?

A : Oh yes…good kissing is the ignition key for sure, and I have had some kissing *to absolutely die for*, on AW. No one wants a washing machine spinning drooler, do they? I like it soft, slow and deep, with tongues too, mmm. I don't even mind garlic or a smoker (though I don't smoke). So very sexy…I have great dental hygiene, so please do your very best too! I have minty gum here, and spare new toothbrushes, just ask. Many reviews (here, and in other places) compliment my sexy kissing. It's an extremely close intimate thing to do, isn’t it? Mmmm… Is this like…too much of an advert about how I love kissing? I just re-read it. I’ll kiss your face off, ok, haha.

Q : I really like talking dirty, is that ok?

A : Oh, that’s fine, sure, I don’t mind you being animalistic and coarse, if I know in advance. I am rather potty mouthed, especially in the *vinegar strokes* encouraging moments. I may stroke my demure pearls whilst egging you on…ooer, missus, wot wot…

Q : Do you have any limits on ethnicity, identity, etc?

A : No, I'm not racist, transphobic or any other ists/isms. I am willing to meet with anyone decent, polite, and genuine. Manners, good behaviour and hygiene are important, that is all. Sometimes (to my horror), I am asked on the phone, but honestly...there's really no need to tell me what ethnic origin you are, and ask if it's ok, etc. A nice person is a nice person, and that's that. I'm so very sorry that you even have to feel/think/need to do that. Men with absurd/low value/stupid/uneducated/patriarchal/illogical/sexist cultural views do not survive my vetting process, whatever their origins. If you have right wing opinions...don’t contact me, we’ve probably got absolutely nothing in common. We’re not here to chat politics, but I’m left leaning, and an ally of other marginalised people, as I am myself, being a sex worker.

Q : I'm really young/really old...will you see me?

A : I'm happy to see polite clean genuine guys of at least 20 yrs old. No upper limit! My visitors so far range from 21 to 93 yrs. Yes, if you've still got a twinkle in your eye, come and wink in my direction, I'll wink back! ; )

Q : I'm a first timer here, a virgin, and I'm nervous!?

A : Oh, you’re honestly a fave already. I have been extremely honoured to be trusted with a first time exp, many times... (aged from 21-60) I would like to chat with you first, to ensure that it is definitely your choice, not pressure from any other side. I may decide that 'this' is not the answer either, and point you in more beneficial non sexual directions. I am not a cold and clinical money grabber, I would prefer to help in the 'just' way, if it is the 'best' way. If you are sure that 'this way' is what you want to do, then I will make sure that your first time memory is good fun! I would be very honoured to be remembered forever! : ) I'm a very considerate easy going lady, and your nerves will subside very quickly once we have met. I'm really very ordinary, honestly... I left home exactly one week after my 18th birthday and I was almost 20yrs old when I had my first time experience. I was lucky, it was my first proper BF, and it was 9mths after our first date. I didn't try to run before I walked, Rome wasn't built in a day. Sometimes, I am a good idea, for some guys though. My first ever client was a virgin, he was 47, I was 24...I'll never forget his face, ever! Just great. I hope he still thinks fondly of me, as I do of him!

Q : I have no feedback...will you see me?

A : This really depends on your email to me....if your email is a sparse one liner, in urbanite txt spk innit bruh, and other assorted knuckle dragging illiterate rubbish, then I'll basically literally, basically literally ignore it, innit bruh, yeah? If you are new here, or to this, and write a nice, honest, decent introduction with seemingly genuine interest, then you should be fine! If you are genuine, you'll probably get through easily.

Q : Is it ok to arrive 30 mins early and call you every 5 mins saying ‘are you ready yet, are you ready yet, but are you ready yet though?’

A : Oh yes, I absolutely love that, that’s my favourite thing ever, that. I am joking... I know you’re keen and excited, but being early just means waiting longer! I’m a woman…I’m not going to be ready ‘early’.

Q : Would you do bareback, I'll pay you more!?

A : I’m cashsexual, but no amount of money will sway me, when faced with heaving cesspit swamp trash, like you. It’s not the request in itself, it’s the power trip game part of ‘I’ll pay you more, and you’ll do what I say.’ NOPE.

Q : I 'cum' quickly, can I have a second chance?

A : Relax…and of course you can! Worrying about it sometimes has the opposite effect. Just enjoy yourself, and we'll have a rest and you'll soon be good to go again ; ) It’s a personal journey, not a competition.

Q : Do you do tours? What's your rates?

A : Sometimes, I go on short jaunts to other UK towns for other work reasons, and see a few gents along the way. I’ll add dates on such travels, when and where, on tours section here.

Q : How did you meet the disabled guys?

A : I am part of a specialised site that enables disabled people to make contact with sex workers, of their own accord and wishes. Fun should be available for everyone! Sometimes their carers and/or parents email me with their requests, I think that's a lovely human gesture. Disabled people are ignored a lot, thought of as non sexual beings, and I don't think that is acceptable. The brain is our biggest sexual organ, and we take our able bodies for granted. Who knows what tomorrow can bring? Life can change in a second. It does. And...I know that I would still want men to touch and desire me...

Q : I’m really very overweight, is that ok?

A : Yes, it’s fine! Physical appearances are way down the list of important requirements for sexy workers, I think most will agree that turning up, good hygiene, correct agreed fee, and a friendly personality are the most important. I’m no thinny minny myself, so don’t worry so.

Q : Outcalls, how far do you travel for those?

A : My stated outcall fees cover London and close surrounds, it's all inclusive. If I need a taxi to your proposed meeting place, then I will show you the first receipt, so that you can calculate my return taxi too. Fare's fair. England and Wales are mostly/usually within my outcall fees, sometime a few GBP more. Outcalls out of London are a 2hr minimum. Outcalls to Scotland, Wales and easy-by-Eurostar destinations (Paris/Brussels/Amsterdam) are possible, and an overnight minimum. Travel costs apply, on top of my fee.

Q : I'd like to book you to visit me at my home, how does that work?

A : I would need your full real name, address, postcode, car reg if you drive. I will check these details. Do not fear, it is only for my safety. Logical brains should tell you that I am not going to ruin my own lucrative business by being indiscreet with this. I have over 10 years online and a strong reputation for being decent, honest and genuine and can show proof of this. You should be wary/concerned if a lady didn't ask for these details. Feel secure in this yourself, that I only meet genuine people who are willing to ensure MY safety too, therefore ensuring YOUR future safety. It makes sense.

Q : We are offering you the opportunity to join our exclusive agency? We only deal with famous celebs and footballers. ££££'s for you!

A : Really!? You chose me? I'm thrilled! My site and profile says 'independent'. If you're so 'exclusive' why are you cold calling/mailing? Maybe you need me, I certainly don't need you. And we both know that you haven't even got an agency... God knows why anyone would think that 'footballers' would be an attractive option. I'd rather gouge my eyes out with a red hot poker. 'Celebs' are just people, and I'm sure they'd appreciate discretion. Therefore, they're not calling the likes of you. And don't tell me...you're so 'top secret' there's no website. Right...and there will be an ahem, 'interview' too? And so 'top secret', that you're randomly mailing strangers...ok, I'm in.

Q : I'm a 'male escort', can we do shared content/photos/bookings?

A : No, I'm not HERE to get YOU laid and paid. Let me guess...this 'content' will get me more work, right? But I'm already getting enough work BY MYSELF without giving you a free go/free advert/free marketing.

Q : I'm a photographer…let's do a sexy shoot...these photos will get you customers!

A : Er…let's not. I've seen your tawdry efforts, and it's clear that you're a fauxtographer with a point and shoot. You have no creative, artistic, or even basic photographic skill. You only ever want to do photos of naked women too, funny that.

Q : I’m in the public eye, I think you’ll recognise me...

A : I have been online for a long time, and I’m not famous/infamous. That’s not luck, that’s because I’m completely uninterested in public attention (which is a side effect of your public facing job). I have professional integrity (stop laughing), and much prefer to be a discreet undercover shadow that slips in and out, unnoticed. My former career was behind the scenes of mainstream tv/film as crew, so I’m not starstruck and desperate to gossip. If you like, I will sign a non-disclosure form for your peace of mind, no problem.

Q : Do you pretend to be a non smoker, or are you really a non smoker? Some say they don't but I can smell it.

A : I am honestly, truly, deeply, a non smoker, but an ex smoker. I stopped in May 2012, and have never touched a cigarette since. No vape things either.

Q : Why are you a sex worker?

A : At first, pure curiosity and then an all consuming intrigue, circa summer, 1990. The previous year, I’d read a book by an American sex worker called Dolores French. Her book was called ‘Working - My Life As A Prostitute’. I was absolutely fascinated. Read it, it’s a good read. I have since spoken to her and said ‘You turned me into a hooker…thanks!’ She laughed. I put an advert in a Sunday paper penpals section, got 80 replies to my P.O. box and I chose 3 people to meet. Wish I'd kept the letters now, what a laugh we could have had, most were silly and wasting my time. I had an excellent timewaster/idiot radar, even then, as a complete newbie. After my first time, I thought I was Xena Warrior Princess and Boudicca all rolled into one. I couldn't stop smiling, it just felt right. I sashayed down the high street feeling all hot and worldly, and went to meet my best friend to let her know that I was still alive. That feeling has never changed, and I will never give it up. It will just evolve and move into other niches as I get older. I am a healthy red blooded woman, I am single, no children (by choice), I'm a free agent and can do exactly as I please. Hardly anyone gets to live their life so freely, so I feel privileged. Some men ask why and how I 'ended up' here, ...as if it's a bad choice. I find that very patronising and insulting. I don't dream about a ‘better’ life, I'm having the life I want, already. I didn't 'end up' here, I came looking and searching all of my own free will. I don't like being patronised and judged by hypocrites who want what I offer, but still try to ‘profile’ me and other sexworkers, but not themselves. I think, that what I do, is honourable, and no one and no society will shame me otherwise. I’m happy to be sexually generous and give pleasure and joy to others. I make people happy, and that makes me feel really good. Humans are bloody weird about sex, it’s just a natural thing. I’d rather avoid these type of people, they can stay oppressed and think what they want.

Q : Do you have reviews elsewhere?

A : Yes, I have built up an excellent reputation for being a safe, genuine, responsible, sensible professional and I have over 160 (non explicit) positive reviews over many different well known sites like AW, PNet, PLink, Cap69, TER as well as some others in Germany, US, NZ and Canada. I find random ones through site stats. I have also found two fakes which were great, and two dreadful ‘revenge’ ones from very strange men who clearly visited purely for the purpose of being obnoxiously unpleasant, to feel ‘in control’ and impress their sad readers, I guess. I am unfazed by this, I’m past caring about trolls. I know other women are very upset by reading such awful lies, but I see the tragedy in these men’s lives, and well…just pity them.

Links

Interview

Q : What is your starsign?

A : Aries March 21 - April 20

Q : What is your Primary Language?

A : English

Q : What is your Secondary Language?

A : Jibberish and Jockanese

Q : How would you describe your non-binary gender?

A : Cisgender

Q : What is your favourite colour?

A : Red. Can't you tell?

Q : Who is your favourite celebrity?

A : Not interested in naff celebrity culture...

Q : What is your best feature?

A : Eyes

Q : What three words best describe your personality?

A : Creative, smart, quirky

Q : What is your favourite food?

A : Italian, Greek, Spanish

Q : What is your favourite drink?

A : My homemade melon and parsnip. I have a juicer!

Q : What is your favourite film?

A : Betty Blue/Death In Venice/Barry Lyndon.

Q : What is your favourite TV programme?

A : Very rarely watch, but history/arts docs if I do.

Q : What are your favourite flowers?

A : Red roses, hyacinths, penis flytrap ; )

Q : What is your favourite perfume?

A : La Petite Robe Noire, by Guerlain.

Q : What is your favourite gift?

A : Velvet Rope candle by Apothia, books on all arts.

Q : What is your favourite holiday destination?

A : Venice...Paris...Rome. Places with history...

Q : What is your ethnicity?

A : Caucasian (White)

Q : What is the colour of your eyes?

A : Blue

Q : What is the colour of your hair?

A : Red

Q : What length is your hair?

A : Shoulder length

Q : How would you describe your body type?

A : Few Extra Pounds

Q : How tall are you?

A : 5'4"

Q : What is your leg measurement?

A : 30"

Q : What is your shoe size?

A : 5

Q : What is your dress size?

A : 16

Q : What size is your chest?

A : 40"

Q : What is your waist measurement?

A : 34"

Q : What is your hips measurement?

A : 50"

Q : What is your bra cup-size?

A : C

Q : How would you describe the size of your breasts?

A : Medium

Q : Are your breasts natural or enhanced?

A : Natural

Q : How is your pubic hair fashioned?

A : Natural

Q : Do you smoke?

A : No

Q : Do you have any tattoos or piercings?

A : Tattoos

Q : If you have tattoos or piercings, how discreet are they

A : Discrete

Q : What times are you always available?

A : 7 days, 10am until 10pm with 1-2 days notice

Q : Will you do overnight bookings?

A : Yes

Q : List of Towns/Areas you will visit

A : London UK and International

Q : How long are you prepared to travel for?

A : 2½+

Q : Nearest rail station?

A : London Bridge

Q : What is the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you in public?

A : 1.Stockings falling down in the street, 2.Walking into a lampost whilst staring at a gorgeous man, and he saw me do it. 3. Running for the bus and missing it, and pretending to not want the bus and kept running...and then I fell! Street cred=zero. Haha.

Q : What sort of men turn you on?

A : Intellect and humour is far sexier than anything else. Not bothered about looks really...looks are just a bonus! Jean Reno, Al Pacino, Vincent Cassel..no lookers for sure. Penchant for bald, burly/chunky, hairy, glasses, brainy geeks, posh foppish types, and men who can teach me a thing or two...

Q : What sort of women turn you on?

A : Scarlett Johansson, Cherie Lunghi, Charlotte Rampling, Nigella, Helen Mirren, Beatrice Dalle in 'Betty Blue'...Lea Seydoux is mesmerising in 'Blue Is The Warmest Colour' Effortless sexiness and confidence.

Q : What is the most memorable sexual experience you’ve ever had?

A : I remember every time I've had sex. Haha : )

Q : What is the most outrageous thing that you’ve done sexually (be honest!)

A : I don't know what's regarded as outrageous? Looking at this site, 'my outrageous' is tame...After arguing with a BF, I once went cruising in a lesbian bar and took a girl home. Went to a lap dancing bar alone, and a man paid for me to have dances. Recently, licking a couple at the 'point of entry', when they were fucking...I'll save it for a book if you don't mind...

Q : Where would you most like to have sex?

A : In my vagina please.

Q : What is your favourite sexual position?

A : Mish! I like being ravished! CAT position is best

Q : What is your second favourite sexual position?

A : Doggy/Cowgirl/Spoons

Q : What is your biggest turn on?

A : Kissing, (yes, I do French kiss with enthusiasm, no avoiding/pecking) and having my boobs sucked and licked...mmmm.

Q : The most sensitive part of my anatomy is?

A : Nipples. Oh, and my brain.

Q : Describe the experience (when and where)

A : With my first boyfriend, in his flat. It was great! Very vanilla though I suppose...I was in love...

Q : What is your favourite sexual fantasy?

A : Engaging in frottage on the underground, corrupting and seducing a man of the cloth, (just did that!) and lots of other things where I'm in charge!

Q : How often do you masturbate?

A : Quite often. Before sleeping esp.

Q : What sexual activity do you enjoy the most?

A : Giving oral, or deep slow grinding penetration, mm

Q : When is your libido at its highest?

A : It gets stronger just before 'time of the month'.